My nose is a redish pink, and I'm thankful for its semi-burn every time I look at the back of Drew's neck. Poor guy didn't know what he was getting into when he took a lawncare job in FL. The work, in my opinion, isn't all that hard, but the sun will do a number on ya. He scoffed at the idea of taking a damp towel and draping it over his neck while at work...I've been there. But I've also done it, and it feels amazing during a hot long day.
So I found my licence. Not many knew it was missing, but my parents did, and I thought they should know their prayers were answered. T'was in the back of Adam's car. I have no idea how it got there, but God helped me find it. Oh, did I mention that they were expired? Got that taken care of today when I switched em over to Florida. I'm now a resident of this state. Crazy, huh? Now I don't know what will happen to my vote...
I speak at Indiantown tomorrow. Please pray for me. I don't feel worthy to speak to those kids. God is really going to have to help me. My youth group and those kids in Indiantown are as different as can be. Not to mention how busy I've seemed to be lately. Tonight was the first night I've actually just stayed at home for awhile.
So I've decided not to go home for the "spring break" here. Oh, but I do have plans on how to spend the time off work...devious plans...haha jk. Maybe a plane ride around the eastern/midwest United States...seems like a good way to spend at least one day...
I got an umbrella for opening a bank account at Bank Atlantic...my face lit up with joy and happiness as the lady brought it out for me. My very own umbrella...wow...words do not come to my mouth to express the enthusiasm that overcame me to thank them for said gift. I do believe I shall never go to another bank. Ever.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Fred
It seems like forever since I've posted. Hum, that sentence is a scary one to write, for its always the beginning of the end of my blogging life. Kind of like seeing an old friend you haven't made contact with in ages. "Oh, Fred! So good to see you. Its been far to long. We should get dinner and catch up!" but you don't catch up. You never make those plans. Instead you go about life as you had before Fred came into it, and then repeat the same line 4 or 5 years later to Fred.
I don't have a friend named Fred really, but if I did I'm sure we wouldn't be comparing him to a blog post. Let us hope that this blog is not a Fred, all the same.
Drew Dahler moved down. Wow, that was fast. I thought I was going to have to explain a lot, but that sentence just about sums it up. Came down Tuesday, is working with me at my job at the golf course. We've had a lot of good times together already, and looking forward to more.
Tomorrow I thought I was going to get the chance to talk to my teens, but I remembered halfway throughout the week that we are actually going to watch a video on creation. I'd tell you what its called, but it wasn't really my call to watch it, and so it slips my mind for the moment. I sure hope the kids do come though. Last week I told them to try and read the story of the crucifixion from one of the Gospels and I'm a little worried about what the response will be tomorrow. Did they complete the task, or did they shirk it (like I used to do in youth group haha)? Hope that they have a better memory for that kinda stuff than I did. More to follow on this story...
People have been telling me I look and sound extremely tired. I'm not quite sure what to make of this. At some point, I do get tired, and at some point I am sure I sound tired. However, I think I've been more tired spiritually than anything, and thus, its weighed on my physical countenance. I usually don't ask for a lot of public prayer for myself (even now my fingers hesitate to type this), but I think I should. I need to admit I need God's peoples help praying. Sometimes one has to admit that they need assistance, and I have learned that when it comes to spiritual matters its best for me to admit that quickly and ask for assistance before I do something stupid :) So thanks in advance for your prayers, even the short little ones.
I don't have a friend named Fred really, but if I did I'm sure we wouldn't be comparing him to a blog post. Let us hope that this blog is not a Fred, all the same.
Drew Dahler moved down. Wow, that was fast. I thought I was going to have to explain a lot, but that sentence just about sums it up. Came down Tuesday, is working with me at my job at the golf course. We've had a lot of good times together already, and looking forward to more.
Tomorrow I thought I was going to get the chance to talk to my teens, but I remembered halfway throughout the week that we are actually going to watch a video on creation. I'd tell you what its called, but it wasn't really my call to watch it, and so it slips my mind for the moment. I sure hope the kids do come though. Last week I told them to try and read the story of the crucifixion from one of the Gospels and I'm a little worried about what the response will be tomorrow. Did they complete the task, or did they shirk it (like I used to do in youth group haha)? Hope that they have a better memory for that kinda stuff than I did. More to follow on this story...
People have been telling me I look and sound extremely tired. I'm not quite sure what to make of this. At some point, I do get tired, and at some point I am sure I sound tired. However, I think I've been more tired spiritually than anything, and thus, its weighed on my physical countenance. I usually don't ask for a lot of public prayer for myself (even now my fingers hesitate to type this), but I think I should. I need to admit I need God's peoples help praying. Sometimes one has to admit that they need assistance, and I have learned that when it comes to spiritual matters its best for me to admit that quickly and ask for assistance before I do something stupid :) So thanks in advance for your prayers, even the short little ones.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Who's Cynical? I'm Not...Am I?
Oh the cynical days where I feel like challenging the world with everything I have. I don't often feel like picking a fight, but today I did. Probably not conducive to my health or well-being, so I digressed from my childish feelings of fighting and resumed my original cynical self that welcomed my face into existence as I stared in the mirror this morning.
Jonathan Robinson stayed at my house a couple of days this week. He just got back from Iraq and decided to use some vacation time to hit up Florida. Naturally when I found out he was down here I told him to come stay with me. What are friends for anyway?
In the morning I get to take Jonathan Leach to the airport...5:30 is looking very early right now, but maybe if I get him there and get to work early I'll get off work early. My sister-in-law (I know you'll read this Beth) insist on giving me something for this favor. I'm thinking a lifetime supply of noodles. I don't know why noodles, but that would mean as much to me as anything else she paid me with, cause its really my pleasure (seriously Beth, your my sister).
Indiantown is coming up soon, as I was reminded again tonight. I pray for those kids while I'm at work. I enjoy my job for that reason. I get to work alone a lot (that's probably going to change though), and when I'm alone I just sorta naturally talk to God. You know, its just me and Him out there, and I'm really quite boring to talk to myself. I find my conversations very predictable.
Oh, I found out today that when someone is unpredictable it doesn't mean that they're unpredictable at all...its something entirely predictable. Yes, you learn new things everyday
Jonathan Robinson stayed at my house a couple of days this week. He just got back from Iraq and decided to use some vacation time to hit up Florida. Naturally when I found out he was down here I told him to come stay with me. What are friends for anyway?
In the morning I get to take Jonathan Leach to the airport...5:30 is looking very early right now, but maybe if I get him there and get to work early I'll get off work early. My sister-in-law (I know you'll read this Beth) insist on giving me something for this favor. I'm thinking a lifetime supply of noodles. I don't know why noodles, but that would mean as much to me as anything else she paid me with, cause its really my pleasure (seriously Beth, your my sister).
Indiantown is coming up soon, as I was reminded again tonight. I pray for those kids while I'm at work. I enjoy my job for that reason. I get to work alone a lot (that's probably going to change though), and when I'm alone I just sorta naturally talk to God. You know, its just me and Him out there, and I'm really quite boring to talk to myself. I find my conversations very predictable.
Oh, I found out today that when someone is unpredictable it doesn't mean that they're unpredictable at all...its something entirely predictable. Yes, you learn new things everyday
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Tomato Soup
So I think I'll be a little more down to earth today. I'm hungry. Yup, tomato soup isn't gonna cut it to much longer. I won't lie, I was a little impressed when I worked a 10 hr day on a dozen peanut butter crackers I had at 7:15 a.m. and still didn't eat again till 6:30. I managed to chew half a pack of gum though and drink maybe 3 gallons of water (maybe I exaggerated that last part a little tiny bit).
Today was my birthday. I'm 21...yes, finally I can buy alcohol legally! I had been waiting for this day for so long. Oh man, to bad I don't have those desires to drink anymore, haha. Funny how that happens. I'm not here to pick and choose about beliefs on drinking and is it wrong, or is it right. I know what I believe about that, and no, its not your business to know what I think about it. Anyway, I got some awesome encouragement from a friend. They didn't know I needed it, I didn't know that they were watching me or even noticing anything about me. But when they told me what they've seen in my life...well, let's just say that it was a blessing from God to hear it. I give all the glory to God for anything that is remotely right in my life, and take all the blame for the stupid things I still do. God's helping me, and I'm a willing servant.
Indiantown kids were a mess tonight. We're trying a new format that they love. Its called "Controlled Chaos" haha. No, we are really doing a new format that I'm sure will work after a little bit of time. It actually wasn't the kids inside as much as it was the kids outside. I KNOW we're making a difference in the kids, when the devil has to use the kids outside the walls to distract. As they banged on the windows and doors I was frustrated, but almost happy that the devil had to try so hard. They really listened to Joel as he talked tonight! Peewee answered a question!! When Joel asked "Who's image are we made in?" Peewee piped up, without hesitation (him? Hesitate to talk...that's a joke) and said "Oh! GOD!". It was beautiful to me! I was so happy, proud, and thankful to God and all the people who have put so much into those kids.
Man, did they really straighten up when I told my team that we were watching for a quiet seat :D some didn't care, but a few did. Even Peewee and Ivan came up to me after and asked if they were good. I told em yes, but not at first. Ivan said he didn't have a Bible. I am going to buy him one. I want them all to have a Bible. A big one, that their parents can't help but see. One in simple English, no fancy words, so a kid can understand it, and a parent that doesn't read a lot of English can pick it up and get something out of it. Pray for that :)
Today was my birthday. I'm 21...yes, finally I can buy alcohol legally! I had been waiting for this day for so long. Oh man, to bad I don't have those desires to drink anymore, haha. Funny how that happens. I'm not here to pick and choose about beliefs on drinking and is it wrong, or is it right. I know what I believe about that, and no, its not your business to know what I think about it. Anyway, I got some awesome encouragement from a friend. They didn't know I needed it, I didn't know that they were watching me or even noticing anything about me. But when they told me what they've seen in my life...well, let's just say that it was a blessing from God to hear it. I give all the glory to God for anything that is remotely right in my life, and take all the blame for the stupid things I still do. God's helping me, and I'm a willing servant.
Indiantown kids were a mess tonight. We're trying a new format that they love. Its called "Controlled Chaos" haha. No, we are really doing a new format that I'm sure will work after a little bit of time. It actually wasn't the kids inside as much as it was the kids outside. I KNOW we're making a difference in the kids, when the devil has to use the kids outside the walls to distract. As they banged on the windows and doors I was frustrated, but almost happy that the devil had to try so hard. They really listened to Joel as he talked tonight! Peewee answered a question!! When Joel asked "Who's image are we made in?" Peewee piped up, without hesitation (him? Hesitate to talk...that's a joke) and said "Oh! GOD!". It was beautiful to me! I was so happy, proud, and thankful to God and all the people who have put so much into those kids.
Man, did they really straighten up when I told my team that we were watching for a quiet seat :D some didn't care, but a few did. Even Peewee and Ivan came up to me after and asked if they were good. I told em yes, but not at first. Ivan said he didn't have a Bible. I am going to buy him one. I want them all to have a Bible. A big one, that their parents can't help but see. One in simple English, no fancy words, so a kid can understand it, and a parent that doesn't read a lot of English can pick it up and get something out of it. Pray for that :)
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
God's Blessings...
God has seriously answered prayer with my job. Today my boss told me that he is going to move me to full time (as if the 47 hrs I worked didn't tell me that). Its amazing to me when I look at the door God opened for this job that didn't seem like the right choice, yet I took it (partially out of desperation, I won't lie), and turned down the seemly better job offer. This job, though, has proven to be a wonderful blessing. Its closer than the other job, its easier, and it pays the same. God is wonderful (yes, I did just imagine it again).
Last Sunday I talked to the teens about how God wants us to use our tongues (something God has been talking to me about...ouch haha). They responded so well, it was wonderful! I'm so excited about the next few weeks. A paintball retreat is coming up that I've got them involved in, and hopefully next Sunday I can bring them all their favorite ice cream (shhh they don't know). Easter is coming up also, and I am going to start showing them a little bit of The Passion and talking to them about what Jesus went through. I don't want to scare them or anything, but I do want them to understand how much God went through to save us from our sins. Easter morning I want to have a wooden cross made, then I want them to write their sins on a piece of paper and nail them to the cross. After they've done that I've had the thought of taking the cross to the ocean and throwing it in, symbolizing that God throws our sins into a sea of forgiveness and grace.
Keep me in your prayers, as always. God is working on me everyday, its wonderful! I've never been so in love with God before. The devil is fighting, don't get me wrong. He's been beating me senseless it feels like sometimes, but God sweeps to my rescue just as I think I've lost it.
Last Sunday I talked to the teens about how God wants us to use our tongues (something God has been talking to me about...ouch haha). They responded so well, it was wonderful! I'm so excited about the next few weeks. A paintball retreat is coming up that I've got them involved in, and hopefully next Sunday I can bring them all their favorite ice cream (shhh they don't know). Easter is coming up also, and I am going to start showing them a little bit of The Passion and talking to them about what Jesus went through. I don't want to scare them or anything, but I do want them to understand how much God went through to save us from our sins. Easter morning I want to have a wooden cross made, then I want them to write their sins on a piece of paper and nail them to the cross. After they've done that I've had the thought of taking the cross to the ocean and throwing it in, symbolizing that God throws our sins into a sea of forgiveness and grace.
Keep me in your prayers, as always. God is working on me everyday, its wonderful! I've never been so in love with God before. The devil is fighting, don't get me wrong. He's been beating me senseless it feels like sometimes, but God sweeps to my rescue just as I think I've lost it.
I stepped into existence today with confusion in my head, and I am exiting the vast world of consciousness in the same state that I found it. I give my refection in the mirror a crooked smile and a weird look, as if to say "you have no idea what just happened, do you?" and my response as I turn out the light is "not even a little one". A dream just danced by...
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Pressing On
So today the devil attempted to get me down in the dumps. Yeah, it pretty much worked, I won't lie. Even now I'm still kinda fighting back and forth. But as I sat here getting hit by all the things I've done in the past, and the reminders of how imperfect I am, God has come. He reminds me of my blessings. You know the song "Count your blessings name them one by one, count your blessings see what God has done"? Well, its pretty hard for the devil to sit on my shoulder when God is showing me all these blessings. Its like sunshine after a rainy day. Just to name a few: God gave me a job this week. God gave me two ministries in the last few months. God's given me amazing friends. God gave me a home. God gave me an amazing brother and sister-in-law who live next door. God gave me joy. God gave me a new heart. The devil wants to drive us into the ground with "poor me" speeches all the time. But when I take an honest look at myself, I'm blessed beyond comprehension. I don't deserve any of those things. Sure, I have problems, don't get me wrong. But I won't get down about it.
When I feel like I'm in a losing battle this song helps me. Its from my favorite band Relient K (you don't like them? Tough)
Pressing On
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Out of mind, out of state.
Trying to keep my head on straight.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
There's only one thing left to do.
Drop all I have and go with you.
[Chorus:]
Somewhere back there I left my worries all behind.
My problems fell out of the back of my mind.
We're going and I'm never knowing (never knowing) where we're going.
To go back to where I was would just be wrong.
I'm pressing on.
Pressing on, all my distress is going, going, gone. (pressing on, pressing on)
And I won't sit back, and take this anymore.
'Cause I'm done with that, I've got one foot out the door.
And to go back where I was would just be wrong
I'm pressing on.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Out of mind, out of state.
Trying to keep my head on straight.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Adversity, we get around it.
Searched for joy, in you I found it.
You look down on me, but you don't look down on me at all.
You smile and laugh, and I feel the love you have for me.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here, and we're gonna make it after all
When I feel like I'm in a losing battle this song helps me. Its from my favorite band Relient K (you don't like them? Tough)
Pressing On
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Out of mind, out of state.
Trying to keep my head on straight.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
There's only one thing left to do.
Drop all I have and go with you.
[Chorus:]
Somewhere back there I left my worries all behind.
My problems fell out of the back of my mind.
We're going and I'm never knowing (never knowing) where we're going.
To go back to where I was would just be wrong.
I'm pressing on.
Pressing on, all my distress is going, going, gone. (pressing on, pressing on)
And I won't sit back, and take this anymore.
'Cause I'm done with that, I've got one foot out the door.
And to go back where I was would just be wrong
I'm pressing on.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Out of mind, out of state.
Trying to keep my head on straight.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here.
Adversity, we get around it.
Searched for joy, in you I found it.
You look down on me, but you don't look down on me at all.
You smile and laugh, and I feel the love you have for me.
I think we're going somewhere.
We're on to something good here, and we're gonna make it after all
Friday, March 6, 2009
I Need A Wash For I've Fallin Down
mmmmhmmm, its true. I'm still making mistakes. I heard the warnings growing up, that the paths we choose will effect us all our lives. Oh, if only I'd have paid attention, haha. Learning to take it with a laugh and grain of salt isn't all that easy, really. I realized today that I've carried over some rather nasty habits from my life of sin that (now that Light has been shed on them) are going on the chopping block. God was quick to convict me, and am I ever thankful. Yes, I feel like an idiot. Yes, I'm probably in deep doo-doo. The important thing is that God taught me a lesson I shall not forget (I think that I'm getting an idea for the youth group Sunday).
God gave me Colossians 4:6 "Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that you man know how ye ought to answer every man". I realized today that my speech wasn't always with grace. In fact, I've had some down right mean and evil speech come from my mouth that wasn't at all holy or upright. God is faithful, that is all I know. I'd have given up on me and my antics long ago, but for some reason He keeps picking me up and dusting me off.
So Saturday I've set up some stuff for the youth group to do. We're going bowling...well, they are haha. I have a ticket for a concert this Saturday, and Brian told me not to worry about it and basically insisted I go to the concert (thanks Brian). I can't wait to see what will happen next :)
Dad called today :) He told me he was praying for me. He doesn't know how much that means to me. His sincere heart and the intense love he conveys is amazing. I've never doubted my father or mother's love for a second (even though my temper and anger may have shown otherwise). I know they only want what is best. They're wonderful and amazing parents. I wouldn't trade them for any other parents in the world. The relationship that they have with each other and God has been a seemingly perfect one. Secretly I compare my relationships with theirs. I do hope that my marriage is as happy as theirs :) I know that most kids have a high opinion of their parents, so I won't try to even compare, but I want them both to know that I love them very much.
God gave me Colossians 4:6 "Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that you man know how ye ought to answer every man". I realized today that my speech wasn't always with grace. In fact, I've had some down right mean and evil speech come from my mouth that wasn't at all holy or upright. God is faithful, that is all I know. I'd have given up on me and my antics long ago, but for some reason He keeps picking me up and dusting me off.
So Saturday I've set up some stuff for the youth group to do. We're going bowling...well, they are haha. I have a ticket for a concert this Saturday, and Brian told me not to worry about it and basically insisted I go to the concert (thanks Brian). I can't wait to see what will happen next :)
Dad called today :) He told me he was praying for me. He doesn't know how much that means to me. His sincere heart and the intense love he conveys is amazing. I've never doubted my father or mother's love for a second (even though my temper and anger may have shown otherwise). I know they only want what is best. They're wonderful and amazing parents. I wouldn't trade them for any other parents in the world. The relationship that they have with each other and God has been a seemingly perfect one. Secretly I compare my relationships with theirs. I do hope that my marriage is as happy as theirs :) I know that most kids have a high opinion of their parents, so I won't try to even compare, but I want them both to know that I love them very much.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Jammies and A Shimmer of Hope
Oh if you only knew! Wow, last night (before I went to sleep) and this morning (when I woke up) I realized the most amazing thing. Want to know what it is? Okay (I'm so excited about this...you really have no idea), I discovered I was wearing THE most comfy jammies I'd ever wore in my lifetime. I could use all sorts of adjectives to describe them to you, but honestly...it wouldn't suffice.
Tonight on the Indiantown route I started out feeling so discouraged. I'm confident now it was merely a trick of the enemy, but it almost worked. I was coming off a caffeine high, and kinda crashed, but God helped me. By the end of the night I felt better about how things were going, and didn't want to give into the immediate desires that came to mind when Mario did something he shouldn't.
Mario...he's a bundle of energy, to say the least. Always has a smart remark, has courage to say what he thinks he should say to anyone (not a good thing right now), he loves being the center of attention, loves to laugh, and has a lot of fight in him. I truly believe that those are things that God gave him (I hope they are, because I know I have some of those qualities). However, I think we can all see how those qualities can be distracting for the other kids, when Mario isn't channeling them into being a good boy. Honestly, its the kids like Mario that I grow to love the most. Yes, you have to be stern and devote a lot of time and attention into them, but I see so much potential for good. Pray that Mario, and the other kids, are not lost to the enemy. They will be mighty warriors if the Lord can get hold of their hearts :)
Many people have asked, so I thought I'd share on my blog. My first day of youth ministry at New Beginnings Community was greatly blessed by God. He helped me so much :) thank you ALL for your prayers! I felt each one. I thought I knew what I was going to talk about the night before, but as I turned out the light and climbed into bed God laid a message on my heart I couldn't stop thinking about. So I got out of bed, grabbed my Bible (when I say "Bible" I always want to pronounce it "bib-lee". I don't know why) and started writing down notes. Andrew Halstead went with me, and I'm happy he did, because he talked to the kids some and kept the conversation flowing (thanks Andrew). I'm trusting God for what to do next. I want to stay and do whatever He would have me to do, for as long as He would have me do it.
Once again, thank you all for your prayers :)
Tonight on the Indiantown route I started out feeling so discouraged. I'm confident now it was merely a trick of the enemy, but it almost worked. I was coming off a caffeine high, and kinda crashed, but God helped me. By the end of the night I felt better about how things were going, and didn't want to give into the immediate desires that came to mind when Mario did something he shouldn't.
Mario...he's a bundle of energy, to say the least. Always has a smart remark, has courage to say what he thinks he should say to anyone (not a good thing right now), he loves being the center of attention, loves to laugh, and has a lot of fight in him. I truly believe that those are things that God gave him (I hope they are, because I know I have some of those qualities). However, I think we can all see how those qualities can be distracting for the other kids, when Mario isn't channeling them into being a good boy. Honestly, its the kids like Mario that I grow to love the most. Yes, you have to be stern and devote a lot of time and attention into them, but I see so much potential for good. Pray that Mario, and the other kids, are not lost to the enemy. They will be mighty warriors if the Lord can get hold of their hearts :)
Many people have asked, so I thought I'd share on my blog. My first day of youth ministry at New Beginnings Community was greatly blessed by God. He helped me so much :) thank you ALL for your prayers! I felt each one. I thought I knew what I was going to talk about the night before, but as I turned out the light and climbed into bed God laid a message on my heart I couldn't stop thinking about. So I got out of bed, grabbed my Bible (when I say "Bible" I always want to pronounce it "bib-lee". I don't know why) and started writing down notes. Andrew Halstead went with me, and I'm happy he did, because he talked to the kids some and kept the conversation flowing (thanks Andrew). I'm trusting God for what to do next. I want to stay and do whatever He would have me to do, for as long as He would have me do it.
Once again, thank you all for your prayers :)
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
A Famous Doctor's Birthday
Sigh, today and yesterday I've learned the true feelings of my neighbors. Evidently I have no motorcycle enthusiast living in my neck of the woods (except my brother of course). Several sources indicate that I am coming or going far to loud. I wish they could hear my bike when I want it to be loud. Its truly obnoxious, but when I leave my humble abode, I honestly keep it to a very "quiet" level.
Today was Dr. Seuss' birthday today. He was a special guy. If you want to get some really good quotes, just Google him and you'll be amazed.
Andrew worked very late tonight. Something about the happen-chance that someone from his store was almost guaranteed to get fired by the "big bad boss" prompted him to stay at work from 9 am to 2:30 am. Good luck bud, hope ya don't get the hatchet after dropping that many hours into your job.
I'm very curious how today (today being Tuesday) will turn out. Normally I don't worry about the next day, unless there is something looming in the distance which I am unsure of, and can go very good or bad all depending on me (of course, God is in control, but if I think that, then I can't worry anymore and that's just silly...wait).
Walking Noah to the beach every few days, and passing the same people has led me to believe that they think he is my son. They smile and some parents give me this "look" that I'm confident is some kind of parental code that says "I've been there". Only problem is, I've never been there, and that look is making me uncomfortable. I've never even changed a diaper (stop gawking, many ppl haven't, sheesh).
Tonight I used the word "retard", but I said it so fast it came out like "rataard". The grief I got from the torment my friends gave me the rest of the night cured me from using the word all together. I have great friends...
Today was Dr. Seuss' birthday today. He was a special guy. If you want to get some really good quotes, just Google him and you'll be amazed.
Andrew worked very late tonight. Something about the happen-chance that someone from his store was almost guaranteed to get fired by the "big bad boss" prompted him to stay at work from 9 am to 2:30 am. Good luck bud, hope ya don't get the hatchet after dropping that many hours into your job.
I'm very curious how today (today being Tuesday) will turn out. Normally I don't worry about the next day, unless there is something looming in the distance which I am unsure of, and can go very good or bad all depending on me (of course, God is in control, but if I think that, then I can't worry anymore and that's just silly...wait).
Walking Noah to the beach every few days, and passing the same people has led me to believe that they think he is my son. They smile and some parents give me this "look" that I'm confident is some kind of parental code that says "I've been there". Only problem is, I've never been there, and that look is making me uncomfortable. I've never even changed a diaper (stop gawking, many ppl haven't, sheesh).
Tonight I used the word "retard", but I said it so fast it came out like "rataard". The grief I got from the torment my friends gave me the rest of the night cured me from using the word all together. I have great friends...
Friday, February 27, 2009
Consternation
So I sat down today to the prospect of a wonderful evening. Yes, I had worked throughout the day, and it felt good to have done a man's job. Something about having to come home and take a shower before thinking of anything else makes me think good about myself...that or I may just need a better deodorant (pause for all the female readers to say "eeew" and resume). Tonight was going to be fun. Ah, don't you love how, when you DON'T make plans, you end up having a wonderful evening? Well, tonight I MADE plans to have a wonderful evening, and they were...disoriented. Now, I already know what you are going to tell me when I say this (no, I'm not a mind reader, I've just heard it from my friends tonight already) but my phone died. Yes, please, don't say it. I know it's terrible for me to be so attached to it, and in my mind I can hear several intellectual people giving their intense thoughts on the matter. Anyway, I've realized how addicted I am to my phone. Not quite as bad as a drug, but its up there with some people's need for coffee throughout the day (yes, I do know that caffeine is a drug). Upon the realization that my phone wasn't going to make it through the night I also realized several other things that bummed me out. A) I shouldn't have gotten the Cajun Shrimp Alfredo. B) Some of my friends are jerks (but that's okay, I am too sometimes) and C) My mom is a racist (well, that was last night, but I thought I'd reiterate it into today's horrific thoughts). These thoughts, mixed together with an overdue meltdown of annoyance settled me into a somber mood for the evening. Ah, now, aren't you all happy you read this?
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Common Sense and Faith
Recently a friend and I were talking about faith. I love the guy with all my heart, but he said something that really got me thinking. What he said went something like this: I'm trying so hard to find the balance between faith and common sense. You know, doing the smart thing. I told him that there wasn't really a balance to faith and common sense, because you can't have to much faith. He disagreed, saying that God wouldn't reward stupidity. Now, I may have taken him wrong, but here are a few examples of seemingly stupid things that people did in the Bible because they had faith.
Daniel: prayed in the window
Smart thing to do: stay out of the window for a few days
Result: thrown in the Lion's den
Result of that: a king saw the power of THE true God
Joshua: marched around the strongest city in Canaan to destroy it
Smart thing to do: use strategy and force to destroy it, or just march around it and let someone else destroy it
Result: Walls came crumbling down and an entire nation saw God's raw and awesome power!
Ruth: widowed and penniless left her home to be with her mother-in-law (who in their right mind?)
Smart thing: stay with daddy and mommy (her cool one) where she would have better chances to find a hubby
Result: God provided for her needs, gave her another (better) hubby, gave her her own book in the Bible, and included her in the linage of Jesus
Noah: built a boat for a hundred and twenty years
Smart thing: stop seemingly wasting his time and enter a life of ease
First result of obeying God: was laughed at and scorned, but stayed dry (and alive) for forty days and nights while the rest of the world was destroyed.
I could go on and on and ON but the point is that in ALL of our lives God asks us to do things that look ridiculous and cause us to scratch our heads, but the point is we can't have to much faith in what He says. I'm sure that Noah lost some direction and questioned what he was doing in those 120 yrs of building (honestly, do you REALLY thing that every one of those days was spent building an Ark and zero of them were spent in prayer seeking God's direction? So to my friend I just say, keep faith. Even today when you go about your life keep in mind that its never bad to have to much faith (even when it makes more sense to do something smarter)
Daniel: prayed in the window
Smart thing to do: stay out of the window for a few days
Result: thrown in the Lion's den
Result of that: a king saw the power of THE true God
Joshua: marched around the strongest city in Canaan to destroy it
Smart thing to do: use strategy and force to destroy it, or just march around it and let someone else destroy it
Result: Walls came crumbling down and an entire nation saw God's raw and awesome power!
Ruth: widowed and penniless left her home to be with her mother-in-law (who in their right mind?)
Smart thing: stay with daddy and mommy (her cool one) where she would have better chances to find a hubby
Result: God provided for her needs, gave her another (better) hubby, gave her her own book in the Bible, and included her in the linage of Jesus
Noah: built a boat for a hundred and twenty years
Smart thing: stop seemingly wasting his time and enter a life of ease
First result of obeying God: was laughed at and scorned, but stayed dry (and alive) for forty days and nights while the rest of the world was destroyed.
I could go on and on and ON but the point is that in ALL of our lives God asks us to do things that look ridiculous and cause us to scratch our heads, but the point is we can't have to much faith in what He says. I'm sure that Noah lost some direction and questioned what he was doing in those 120 yrs of building (honestly, do you REALLY thing that every one of those days was spent building an Ark and zero of them were spent in prayer seeking God's direction? So to my friend I just say, keep faith. Even today when you go about your life keep in mind that its never bad to have to much faith (even when it makes more sense to do something smarter)
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
From One Anti-Five O'clock Person To Another
I basically spent the entire day with Noah. That was, amazing. He is decidedly a morning person...or maybe a mid-day person. But he is definitely not a five o'clock person.
Adam gave me a sandwich for lunch...thank you Adam. It was...delish.
After that I came over to my brother and sister-in-law's house(I'm still getting used to that term Beth, cause I've always just thought of you as a sister) . Noah was up and at-em. We had a lot of fun together today. Went to the beach and watched the birds...on the way to the beach we listened to the Beach Boys...merely a coincidence that we did though, there was no preconceived ideas in my head when I played it, haha.
We (Noah and I) were almost drenched, and just barely made it to the cafeteria before a downpour.
When we got home (my brother and sister-in-law's) it was 5 o'clock. He was a grouch. Develops a sever case of A.D.D. and the only thing that will hold his attention for more than 5 seconds is (can you guess?) my cell phone. His infatuation with cell phones concerns me, because he is almost to the same level of addiction that I am. Poor guy. He'll grow up never knowing what its like to stay out later than he was supposed to, because his parents couldn't get a hold of him to tell him his curfew changed. Noah, the things you'll be cursed to put up with by this technology. I just wish you could understand me as you each for my phone again...you don't want this haha.
Um, so I grew in God today. A little bit of faith was the result, and a lot of fumbling around and feeling silly the means by which I procured my ounce of faith, and I don't regret it (the fumbling and feeling silly part). God is so good...I want to tell the world. I want to share it with everyone. It makes me sick to see the amount of decay in our churches. Wake up :) Know God is alive! He's real! He LOVES us! Sigh, I'll leave that sermon for another day...
Adam gave me a sandwich for lunch...thank you Adam. It was...delish.
After that I came over to my brother and sister-in-law's house(I'm still getting used to that term Beth, cause I've always just thought of you as a sister) . Noah was up and at-em. We had a lot of fun together today. Went to the beach and watched the birds...on the way to the beach we listened to the Beach Boys...merely a coincidence that we did though, there was no preconceived ideas in my head when I played it, haha.
We (Noah and I) were almost drenched, and just barely made it to the cafeteria before a downpour.
When we got home (my brother and sister-in-law's) it was 5 o'clock. He was a grouch. Develops a sever case of A.D.D. and the only thing that will hold his attention for more than 5 seconds is (can you guess?) my cell phone. His infatuation with cell phones concerns me, because he is almost to the same level of addiction that I am. Poor guy. He'll grow up never knowing what its like to stay out later than he was supposed to, because his parents couldn't get a hold of him to tell him his curfew changed. Noah, the things you'll be cursed to put up with by this technology. I just wish you could understand me as you each for my phone again...you don't want this haha.
Um, so I grew in God today. A little bit of faith was the result, and a lot of fumbling around and feeling silly the means by which I procured my ounce of faith, and I don't regret it (the fumbling and feeling silly part). God is so good...I want to tell the world. I want to share it with everyone. It makes me sick to see the amount of decay in our churches. Wake up :) Know God is alive! He's real! He LOVES us! Sigh, I'll leave that sermon for another day...
Saturday, February 21, 2009
There Is Something Amiss Devil Horn Man
Took a big step (for me) this weekend. My (other) dad, the one here in FL, asked me to consider helping out with a youth pastor position. Honestly, I fought it. I'm not a strong mighty Christian that just accepts things like that on a whim, nor have I heard a booming voice from God telling me to do this. No, I have struggled with saying yes for quite sometime. But this week I felt God settle on my shoulder and say very quietly (the way He has to do to get my attention) that everything will be okay. I'm not accepting the task at hand because I think that "Jared is able". No, I'm doing because I can do all things through Christ, Who strengthens me. Keep me in your prayers constantly, for I feel like I am so weak, and so tiny. God will be the only reason anything good comes out of this. And I give Him all the glory and honor for anything that will happen.
I also discovered that a Renaissance festival has about two or three good, clean acts in it. Saw a lot of examples of how NOT to let my daughter dress...EVER. And I discovered that Sherry can give the most evil dirty little looks. Quite disturbing actually. Although I do believe I got the last laugh when the flute man hit on her hardcore (Sherry, remember, you know where to find him). Elf ears are not really that becoming on me, and whoever the man was that put the devil horns on me should know I felt very very awkward, yet was strangely curious as to what the heck was going on. Hence, due to the happen-chance that there was a camera present, a picture is floating around with me in horns. Thank you devil horn man. Oh, and finally, I realized today that I am a geek when it comes to ancient weaponry lingo (So I enjoyed reading the Encyclopedia and played a lot of knight games on the computer growing up...what about it?). I felt odd trying to explain the difference between some, and most likely bored my friends to death with little facts they knew already.
Highlight: watching an acrobat do comedy...yes, it was 10x funnier than it sounds
Well all you nosey family members, I hope this satisfies your taste for news awhile longer.
I also discovered that a Renaissance festival has about two or three good, clean acts in it. Saw a lot of examples of how NOT to let my daughter dress...EVER. And I discovered that Sherry can give the most evil dirty little looks. Quite disturbing actually. Although I do believe I got the last laugh when the flute man hit on her hardcore (Sherry, remember, you know where to find him). Elf ears are not really that becoming on me, and whoever the man was that put the devil horns on me should know I felt very very awkward, yet was strangely curious as to what the heck was going on. Hence, due to the happen-chance that there was a camera present, a picture is floating around with me in horns. Thank you devil horn man. Oh, and finally, I realized today that I am a geek when it comes to ancient weaponry lingo (So I enjoyed reading the Encyclopedia and played a lot of knight games on the computer growing up...what about it?). I felt odd trying to explain the difference between some, and most likely bored my friends to death with little facts they knew already.
Highlight: watching an acrobat do comedy...yes, it was 10x funnier than it sounds
Well all you nosey family members, I hope this satisfies your taste for news awhile longer.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
A Look Through My Brown Eyes
The back door is opened again...Seth turns around and yells in the most serious voice I've ever heard Seth ever use. I think it was the same for the kids, because they stopped. But, like normal, when a door is shut (no pun intended) another opens, cause pretty soon they started yelling and fighting amongst each other. Poor Josh, he got the blunt of it. He gets the blunt of it a lot. Week one I was in Indiantown I knew that. He sat alone on the slide, so defensive. So ready for the attack. His heart still has a tender side. A side that we adults have learned to make hard and let things roll off our backs. It hurts him still when the kids call him fat, he hasn't learned to laugh it off, or make a joke about it. They let him have it with both barrels tonight, and by the time the van stops his face is in his hands and doesn't want to get off the bus. I did what I could, but it took "Super-Joy" to the rescue to convince him it was either home or the service, no staying on the bus.
Wow, a missing hat, malfunctioning equipment, and two prayers later its starting to get quiet. Flo and Becka play and lead the kids in a song...if you call the yelling of lyrics singing (I have to admit, I love hearing them sing, anyway for those words to get stuck in their heads). Some how I strategically placed myself behind the four rowdiest kids (or were they just four kids in front of me...they all seemed pretty rowdy). Peewee...oh Peewee...how innocent he can look. Super-Joy gave him a moment on the floor tonight...he decided he didn't like to be the center of attention, and since we don't allow sideshows he opted for at least whispering. I look over at Becka and catch her eye, big smile. She loves the kids here, all the workers do. Tonight Johnny spoke to the kids about temptation, and did an amazing job. I'm glad he takes it seriously. Joel, oh Joel, I can see that you have thousands of thoughts in your head when you hear those kids saying or doing something they shouldn't. He has a lot of patience, a lot of love. Seth, you too have patience in abundance, and a love for those kids, I can see on your face. Flo, wow, I've never seen someone so gifted with being in front of a crowd and handling hecklers like you do. Becka, I'm not really sure what you do (just kidding) but those kids sure do love you an awful lot. Then, the backbone of the whole operation: Super-Joy. No, that's not her nickname (unless I can officially give those out). She is truly used by God in an amazing and powerful way. A true servant. She'd get embarrassed and quickly give all the praise to God if she saw or heard me say this.
That's Indiantown. Sure, when they come to church you may see a loud crazy bunch of Mexican kids that don't have manners or know the "church ethics" so many of us grew up with. They didn't have your parents. But we don't care out in Indiantown. We're there (like Super-Joy said tonight) to give those kids a chance at something better. If that means letting them have their rowdy moments and cake fights, so be it. Those kids have had an impact made in their lives by the ministry there. Mario, he got saved two weeks ago, he tries so hard. Even told Josh he was sorry for saying mean things tonight. Mario saying sorry, for anything, is a miracle in my book. Whoever said God is dead, is a liar. Mario is proof enough for me.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Epiphanies and Cookies
So today left a bad taste in my proverbial mouth. When something is gnawing away at my heart and mind it takes more than some milk and cookies to forget about it, I've found (although, they were delicious). Life is a lot of fun sometimes, but then you have "growing up" moments that aren't all that grand. But you come out of those moments a little wiser, and a little stronger. Even though the fun moments have always (and I hope always will) out weighed the bad ones, it seems that the bad moments drag on entirely to long.
Note to self: Urban Outfitters does NOT allow you to take silly photos of friend.
Mind Wonderings: Epiphanies are not always appreciated or greeted with the same enthusiasm amongst your friends as it was in your mind.
Random Fact: Sometimes I do things I don't want to, but manage to act like I do...and only a few observant ones could ever know the truth.
Note to self: Urban Outfitters does NOT allow you to take silly photos of friend.
Mind Wonderings: Epiphanies are not always appreciated or greeted with the same enthusiasm amongst your friends as it was in your mind.
Random Fact: Sometimes I do things I don't want to, but manage to act like I do...and only a few observant ones could ever know the truth.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Gimme a Moment
I wipe another tear from my eye, and refocus my gaze upon the TV screen in front of me. The emotions and sympathy felt toward the people whom the actors were depicting overwhelmed my senses, and for the first time in a long time, I cried. I don't cry during movies a lot, so don't take me for a sap, but watching the TV show "Band of Brothers" has given me an outlook on war not seen in many movies. It all came to a climax though, when the Allies finally had fought their way into Nazi Germany, and began finding the concentration camps. A soldier slowly walked into one such camp, and I saw the happiness and joy come upon the prisoner's faces as they realized that they had been liberated. In one scene a prisoner threw his arms around a soldier, crying, tears flowing from his face. He hugged the soldier in his weak fragile arms, whole body shaking, and kissed the soldier. The remnants of a man, starved, put through who knows what, probably giving up hope every day, thinking he would never see the outside of his prison. It moved me so much as I remember it all, and tears flow again. The man's tears became my tears, his sorrow, and emptiness felt in my heart, and then the joy on his face as his liberator's came into view. In that brief scene I was reminded of my own pitiful state. How I had once been a prisoner in sin, starved of love, I had locked myself there, and then one day God came into my prison. Strong and mighty, I saw Him. Crying, and threw my arms around Him. God saved me. Words cannot describe the love in my heart for my Savior. Like that prisoner, I too have been liberated. Like that prisoner, I now thank my Savior for all He did to liberate this starving soul from his self-inflicted prison
Thursday, February 12, 2009
camping out v-day
Ah the days are getting warmer , the sun is shinning brighter, and I'm still addicted to Call of Duty 4. Not to brag, but I'm not terrible. I'm not pro or even close, but I can get the job done. Yes, I'm a gamer at times...sometimes a little to much. But that's a sore subject you probably don't want to bring up to me, cause I may just shun you, or get defensive (I know what your thinking, and you can forget it Becky).
Camp Meeting is in full swing. Some people around campus don't appreciate all the hustle and bustle, but really, I do enjoy it. The new faces, the excitement, the over zealous security, and who's to forget the services where God still comes and meets with His people. No, it may not be like it was in the glory days, but just because all the girls aren't wearing hoes and don't all have their hair up in the same style doesn't mean that God still isn't here. So, instead of hiding in your room, house, or trailer, get out and meet someone. Talk to a visiting missionary. Push a random kid on a swing. Look for someone to pray for, someone to encourage. Don't hide. Don't be afraid. Allow God to use you in Sea Breeze Camp '09.
Valentine's Day is tomorrow. St. Valentine marrying all of those couples didn't have any idea what he was doing to us men in the 21st century. Ladies who are single, allow me to just say this: if you don't get a v-day card don't worry. You will get your share in the future. God has someone in mind for you. Not all those girls who have a man right now are going to be happy with the outcome of the relationship their in, so count your blessings and keep your chin up. And when all else fails, just remember, Valentine's Day is overrated, haha.
Encouragement comes in many different packages. For me, today, it came in an unexpected manner. I love being a friend and encouraging, my dad says its my spiritual gift. But at times I need a little myself. I can't go into detail, but I just want to say when I help a friend out, in even the smallest way, and they appreciate it (just a simple thank you) I feel encouraged :) I know, its not fireworks or anything, but it really does help me along. Its good to know I'm good for something every once in awhile :P
Camp Meeting is in full swing. Some people around campus don't appreciate all the hustle and bustle, but really, I do enjoy it. The new faces, the excitement, the over zealous security, and who's to forget the services where God still comes and meets with His people. No, it may not be like it was in the glory days, but just because all the girls aren't wearing hoes and don't all have their hair up in the same style doesn't mean that God still isn't here. So, instead of hiding in your room, house, or trailer, get out and meet someone. Talk to a visiting missionary. Push a random kid on a swing. Look for someone to pray for, someone to encourage. Don't hide. Don't be afraid. Allow God to use you in Sea Breeze Camp '09.
Valentine's Day is tomorrow. St. Valentine marrying all of those couples didn't have any idea what he was doing to us men in the 21st century. Ladies who are single, allow me to just say this: if you don't get a v-day card don't worry. You will get your share in the future. God has someone in mind for you. Not all those girls who have a man right now are going to be happy with the outcome of the relationship their in, so count your blessings and keep your chin up. And when all else fails, just remember, Valentine's Day is overrated, haha.
Encouragement comes in many different packages. For me, today, it came in an unexpected manner. I love being a friend and encouraging, my dad says its my spiritual gift. But at times I need a little myself. I can't go into detail, but I just want to say when I help a friend out, in even the smallest way, and they appreciate it (just a simple thank you) I feel encouraged :) I know, its not fireworks or anything, but it really does help me along. Its good to know I'm good for something every once in awhile :P
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Mrs. Miller
Sometimes I literally sit in awe of myself during a caffeine high. Sad, pathetic, and unnecessary, I know. But after two Rockstar energy drinks, which I did not need, I just had to savor the blissful and disconcerted feelings obtained by the sweet nectar. I don't think I'm addicted to caffeine really, but I sure do love how hyper I get...not quite sure how my friends feel about that though, haha.
God is still good today, better than the day before. Just had to say it :)
When asked how she was, Mrs. Miller used to always reply, "The Lord is better to me than He is to anybody else."
She went on to be with Jesus, but the twinkle in her eye and smile on her face convinced me that I wanted that kind of relationship with God. I feel like I've let Him down, yet He's been so good to me and is so merciful that I feel like Sister Miller did.
Today, I feel like God was better to me than He was to anybody else.
God is still good today, better than the day before. Just had to say it :)
When asked how she was, Mrs. Miller used to always reply, "The Lord is better to me than He is to anybody else."
She went on to be with Jesus, but the twinkle in her eye and smile on her face convinced me that I wanted that kind of relationship with God. I feel like I've let Him down, yet He's been so good to me and is so merciful that I feel like Sister Miller did.
Today, I feel like God was better to me than He was to anybody else.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
A Cross to Bear
Today has been a good day, yet a trial. I often find that my day is most defined by the few hours at the end, and rarely ends the same way it starts. Today started off as a good day, don't you love those? But by 1 or 2 I could tell things were going to just start slipping.
Sad as it is, text messaging and winning Guitar Hero III were the perks/highlights of my day....or was it lunch? Anyway, I did have a good time with friends this evening, but it was the burden for a certain one friend, whom God put on my shoulders to bear, which mellowed my fantastic day down to a struggle just to make it through. I felt a burden so strong for this friend as he told me what was going on in his life, and why he had given up on God. I too had been there, given up on religion, seen the corruption and evil taking place in the holy circles. I wanted nothing to do with it, and separated myself to a place far from God, and I was there to stay...I thought.
Everything in my screamed at my friend to see the amazing love of God. I tried, in vain it seemed, to tell him that God has a love for us we don't deserve, a want for us we can't comprehend, a desire for a relationship for the undesirable. I do not know if I did anything or not, but I do know that God is going to help my friend.
I remember being at that low point thinking that nothing could help, because I had no desire to pick myself up. I'd already lost everything I had, my life was in shambles, and God seemed to be no where. I didn't think I was worth it, honestly. It was at that low point when God found me.
I pray He finds my friend soon. I pray, when He finds that lost soul, that my friend will willingly give himself over, and see that there is no better way. I pray for my friend to desire to be forgiven. I see why on some mission fields people are flocking to be saved now. They have seen all their lives what "nothing" is like...what a life without God is like, and a man comes from across the world and shows them a life of purpose. Here we have so many distractions. Things that deaden our minds to our spiritual state. Its happened to me far to often. I see now though... without God I think I would just want to die, because without Him, my life is pointless...
Sad as it is, text messaging and winning Guitar Hero III were the perks/highlights of my day....or was it lunch? Anyway, I did have a good time with friends this evening, but it was the burden for a certain one friend, whom God put on my shoulders to bear, which mellowed my fantastic day down to a struggle just to make it through. I felt a burden so strong for this friend as he told me what was going on in his life, and why he had given up on God. I too had been there, given up on religion, seen the corruption and evil taking place in the holy circles. I wanted nothing to do with it, and separated myself to a place far from God, and I was there to stay...I thought.
Everything in my screamed at my friend to see the amazing love of God. I tried, in vain it seemed, to tell him that God has a love for us we don't deserve, a want for us we can't comprehend, a desire for a relationship for the undesirable. I do not know if I did anything or not, but I do know that God is going to help my friend.
I remember being at that low point thinking that nothing could help, because I had no desire to pick myself up. I'd already lost everything I had, my life was in shambles, and God seemed to be no where. I didn't think I was worth it, honestly. It was at that low point when God found me.
I pray He finds my friend soon. I pray, when He finds that lost soul, that my friend will willingly give himself over, and see that there is no better way. I pray for my friend to desire to be forgiven. I see why on some mission fields people are flocking to be saved now. They have seen all their lives what "nothing" is like...what a life without God is like, and a man comes from across the world and shows them a life of purpose. Here we have so many distractions. Things that deaden our minds to our spiritual state. Its happened to me far to often. I see now though... without God I think I would just want to die, because without Him, my life is pointless...
Friday, February 6, 2009
Coffee, Guitar, and Ruckus
Today has been amazing. Yesterday was better. I've re-discovered something. The wonderful world of caffeine highs. Wow, ten cups of coffee just about does it. I smiled and laughed the entire day. Of course, it came at a small cost of a crash somewhere around 12 a.m. but it was worth it I think. Even the tossing and turning on the couch didn't take my feelings of being somewhat accomplished.
I also found out that sometimes, babies do things to be annoying, just like me haha. Yes. Yes, I did just admit that I am like a baby in some ways (wow, that's insane).
I also realized that I love eating lunches with my friends. Laughing and carrying on in a loud and ruckus manner. I'm quite sure that far to many older people think we are out of control, but I'm afraid we don't care to much about volume control.
Also, I've learned to play a few new songs on guitar. Jon Hsu (my Asian friend) has been giving me tips, and my good friend Beck...a allowed me to borrow a guitar. Feel very honored to use it :) That was very nice of her.
The Lord has been good to me. I've been reminded that even though I've been saved, I still have a long way to go. He's been with me in incredible ways. Where I am today is only by His grace, where I'm going tomorrow would be no where without Him.
I also found out that sometimes, babies do things to be annoying, just like me haha. Yes. Yes, I did just admit that I am like a baby in some ways (wow, that's insane).
I also realized that I love eating lunches with my friends. Laughing and carrying on in a loud and ruckus manner. I'm quite sure that far to many older people think we are out of control, but I'm afraid we don't care to much about volume control.
Also, I've learned to play a few new songs on guitar. Jon Hsu (my Asian friend) has been giving me tips, and my good friend Beck...a allowed me to borrow a guitar. Feel very honored to use it :) That was very nice of her.
The Lord has been good to me. I've been reminded that even though I've been saved, I still have a long way to go. He's been with me in incredible ways. Where I am today is only by His grace, where I'm going tomorrow would be no where without Him.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Sleep Abomination...
Oh today. It was a day dedicated to the abomination of all things pertaining to sleep. My goal, it seemed, last night was to do my very best to stay up as late as possible. That goal hit the proverbial limit at seven a.m. and I had a blast of a time getting there.
Not wanting to ruin a good thing of being tired and exhausted, I woke up to the sound of my cell playing a song that I hate (why its my ringtone, I do not know). It was Adam...oh Adam...if you only knew the sacrifice I made to watch that little nephew of mine. Apparently Adam didn't get haircuts until I came around to keep an eye on Noah while Beth gave him a haircut. Poor guy, good thing I was available to be of service after just 3 hrs of rest.
Aside from watching Noah, I discovered that not all pickles are good pickles and my favorite number is 21. Why? Because it can be, that's why. I also discovered today that dogs respond best to being grabbed in an aggressive manner than spanking them for barking in 4 second intervals.
The rest of my day consisted of working out, chatting online with friend(s), and learning to play a grand total of two songs (only a little ha ha) on a borrowed guitar (thank you Rebbecca).
I'm still trying to figure out if I should go to bed anytime soon. I don't want to miss out on anything amazing...
Not wanting to ruin a good thing of being tired and exhausted, I woke up to the sound of my cell playing a song that I hate (why its my ringtone, I do not know). It was Adam...oh Adam...if you only knew the sacrifice I made to watch that little nephew of mine. Apparently Adam didn't get haircuts until I came around to keep an eye on Noah while Beth gave him a haircut. Poor guy, good thing I was available to be of service after just 3 hrs of rest.
Aside from watching Noah, I discovered that not all pickles are good pickles and my favorite number is 21. Why? Because it can be, that's why. I also discovered today that dogs respond best to being grabbed in an aggressive manner than spanking them for barking in 4 second intervals.
The rest of my day consisted of working out, chatting online with friend(s), and learning to play a grand total of two songs (only a little ha ha) on a borrowed guitar (thank you Rebbecca).
I'm still trying to figure out if I should go to bed anytime soon. I don't want to miss out on anything amazing...
Cowboys and Indians
I grew up in Indiana on six acres of land. A tractor shed with a clubhouse and slide, two old barns (that were both tore down eventually) and an acre woods stood on the property. Even with all that, it was across the country road where my real adventure land lay. Here there stood 9 or 10 acres of pure bliss for any boy...and by pure bliss I mean, woods. In my spare time (and time that wasn't to be spared) I would fight and explore. What did I fight? Well, depending on who I could convince to wonder out into the woods with me, my brother's and sister being the main prey and on the wondrous occasion my cousin Phil would come visit. Oh the battles and adventures we had. My mother would holler and yell for us to come home, but we NEVER heard her till the last bit of energy was spent. Oh the trouble that woods caused us. The spankings we got for how dirty we were or the talking-to's for the mud or animals we brought back with us. Didn't matter to us, the more dangerous the better.
Summer time, the creek would flood: we would toss large logs in and "save them", not ever thinking we might need saving.
Winter would come and it would snow: then freeze rain on top, we would grab our sleds. But it wasn't enough to just sled down the ice-covered-hill, no, we had to try to HIT the person at the bottom as they tried to get out of the way (may we have a brief moment of silence for the many broken sleds lay at the bottom of our hill). The owner of the woods would drag a huge fireplace out to our sledding hill and make a fire to warm us as we tried to wreck destruction upon our snowy little woods.
Spring would come: we'd find some berries...no, we didn't know what they were, but we'd eat em.
Baby snake found in the dry creek bed in the fall: catch it! Who cares if its poisonous or if its trying to bite! We'd put it in a glass jar and chase Sarah around with it.
Oh the memories of playing in the woods. It was the Old West, where we would have glorious battles between Cowboy and Indian. The Battles between the good Kings and evil soldiers. Where I said the "d word" and got told on by Adam (thanks you jerk)...it WASN'T where I got my mouth washed out with soap though.... Its where I got the poles for my Indian tepee...
Now its just a woods again. I don't think that the animals are quite as happy as they once were. The trees no longer tickled by yelling and laughter. Now, its just trees and grass...but its waiting. Waiting for that next child to discover its enchanting power. There is magic in the woods...magic, just waiting for a child to unlock its gifts and pour them out all around...oh, how I miss it.
Summer time, the creek would flood: we would toss large logs in and "save them", not ever thinking we might need saving.
Winter would come and it would snow: then freeze rain on top, we would grab our sleds. But it wasn't enough to just sled down the ice-covered-hill, no, we had to try to HIT the person at the bottom as they tried to get out of the way (may we have a brief moment of silence for the many broken sleds lay at the bottom of our hill). The owner of the woods would drag a huge fireplace out to our sledding hill and make a fire to warm us as we tried to wreck destruction upon our snowy little woods.
Spring would come: we'd find some berries...no, we didn't know what they were, but we'd eat em.
Baby snake found in the dry creek bed in the fall: catch it! Who cares if its poisonous or if its trying to bite! We'd put it in a glass jar and chase Sarah around with it.
Oh the memories of playing in the woods. It was the Old West, where we would have glorious battles between Cowboy and Indian. The Battles between the good Kings and evil soldiers. Where I said the "d word" and got told on by Adam (thanks you jerk)...it WASN'T where I got my mouth washed out with soap though.... Its where I got the poles for my Indian tepee...
Now its just a woods again. I don't think that the animals are quite as happy as they once were. The trees no longer tickled by yelling and laughter. Now, its just trees and grass...but its waiting. Waiting for that next child to discover its enchanting power. There is magic in the woods...magic, just waiting for a child to unlock its gifts and pour them out all around...oh, how I miss it.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Sunday Dinners: A Lost Art
Somethings in life we forget to give thanks for, like shoelaces...or deodorant. Well, today I was reminded how thankful I am for the Sunday dinner. Many people in America have lost the art of the family tradition. I, myself, have grown up every Sunday eating a very unhealthy amount of mashed potatoes, meat, or desert. The food has not always been special or delicious, rather, its the fact that a family took the time to gather around a dinner table, say a prayer of thanks, and dig in. The food is great, but the chance to laugh and converse with the friends and family, in my opinion, is the true blessing. To often we get to busy in our week to find out about each other's life. But today I was reminded that, through the laughter and friendly gossip, I have the best friends and family anyone could ask for.
Here's to my family back home. To a mom that fixes the best green beans. To an adopted mom that takes my cell so I won't txt. To a adopted Grandma that spoils me. To Brian, who tells the most interesting stories. To a sister-in-law who cooks the most tender roast if falls apart. To a dad, that cooks every bit as good as mom (but mom still makes the better pies). To friends who are rotten enough to laugh at dropped dishes. Thank you all, for reminding me of the lost art of Sunday dinner :)
Here's to my family back home. To a mom that fixes the best green beans. To an adopted mom that takes my cell so I won't txt. To a adopted Grandma that spoils me. To Brian, who tells the most interesting stories. To a sister-in-law who cooks the most tender roast if falls apart. To a dad, that cooks every bit as good as mom (but mom still makes the better pies). To friends who are rotten enough to laugh at dropped dishes. Thank you all, for reminding me of the lost art of Sunday dinner :)
Saturday, January 31, 2009
I've come to far...
Today as I was working out (please understand when I say "work out" I am not refering to me pumping insane amounts of iron...they are infact very light haha), and God reminded me where I came from, and where I am now. Upon arriving home I felt like I should post my testimony on here :)
So, here it goes.
I grew up in a conservative Christian home. I knew all my life all the things I needed to do to be saved. Many times I would commit my life to Christ, however, I fell over and over in my imaturity and because never truly allowed my heart to be sanctified and made holy. I wanted to see the "world" as it were. Secretly in my heart I had a desire to get out there and taste sin, but I knew enough not to say that out loud, and it showed through in my life. Even after almost two years of going to a Bible College I was still dabbling in sin. Oh, I'd get help here and there, and many times I know that I was sincer in my walk with God. But in my imaturity I'd fall. Then I was given a gift one day. A book called "Wild at Heart". If you haven't read that book, guy or girl, you should. As I read it I saw what I'd been missing all the while. I'd been holding a piece back from God. I allowed something to take its place, and depended on that thing to get me through life. God shook my world, and showed me I had to let go. That was the single hardest thing I have ever done. To describe what I went through in that process wouldn't really do it justice. I'm not asking for sympathy, because it was the best thing that could have happened to me.
it wasn't until almost 6 months later that I had the bright idea to go to a hardrock concert. Some crazy bands were playing (Bullet for My Valentine, Trapt, Buckcherry, Apocaliptica, Puddle of Mud, and some others). I've never been to something like that, and as I walked among the masses of ppl I saw enough. Fights broke out, drugs being used freely, and people were passed out before the headliners even took stage. I found a spot in the grass and watched. As drunken soul after drunken soul passed by me my stomach churned.
That's when I found out that God goes to rock concerts. He began whispering to me in that still small voice. The kind where no matter how loud the music is, no matter whats going on around you, its heard in a gentle way. My heart melted, and as Buckcherry took stage (the band I wanted to hear the most), my friends and I started to head for the exit. I'd seen enough. By the time I got to the car I knew I wanted nothing to do with that lifestyle...I knew Who I wanted in charge of my life.
Every day I grow a little more, and it seems like every day I make a blunder. But now, instead of just falling back to square one, I lean on God. He picks me up, dusts off the dirt and says, "Walk WITH Me this time...". Yeah, its a walk with me :) I haven't figured out the "running" part yet. Ironically I think that happens the older and longer ya stay with it.
God is my everything now. It has been a long journey getting here, and I still have pains (its true that the mistakes you make in your past haunt you). But now, instead of trying to deal with those painful memories or haunting thoughts, I give them to God. I owe all I am or ever will be to Him
So, here it goes.
I grew up in a conservative Christian home. I knew all my life all the things I needed to do to be saved. Many times I would commit my life to Christ, however, I fell over and over in my imaturity and because never truly allowed my heart to be sanctified and made holy. I wanted to see the "world" as it were. Secretly in my heart I had a desire to get out there and taste sin, but I knew enough not to say that out loud, and it showed through in my life. Even after almost two years of going to a Bible College I was still dabbling in sin. Oh, I'd get help here and there, and many times I know that I was sincer in my walk with God. But in my imaturity I'd fall. Then I was given a gift one day. A book called "Wild at Heart". If you haven't read that book, guy or girl, you should. As I read it I saw what I'd been missing all the while. I'd been holding a piece back from God. I allowed something to take its place, and depended on that thing to get me through life. God shook my world, and showed me I had to let go. That was the single hardest thing I have ever done. To describe what I went through in that process wouldn't really do it justice. I'm not asking for sympathy, because it was the best thing that could have happened to me.
it wasn't until almost 6 months later that I had the bright idea to go to a hardrock concert. Some crazy bands were playing (Bullet for My Valentine, Trapt, Buckcherry, Apocaliptica, Puddle of Mud, and some others). I've never been to something like that, and as I walked among the masses of ppl I saw enough. Fights broke out, drugs being used freely, and people were passed out before the headliners even took stage. I found a spot in the grass and watched. As drunken soul after drunken soul passed by me my stomach churned.
That's when I found out that God goes to rock concerts. He began whispering to me in that still small voice. The kind where no matter how loud the music is, no matter whats going on around you, its heard in a gentle way. My heart melted, and as Buckcherry took stage (the band I wanted to hear the most), my friends and I started to head for the exit. I'd seen enough. By the time I got to the car I knew I wanted nothing to do with that lifestyle...I knew Who I wanted in charge of my life.
Every day I grow a little more, and it seems like every day I make a blunder. But now, instead of just falling back to square one, I lean on God. He picks me up, dusts off the dirt and says, "Walk WITH Me this time...". Yeah, its a walk with me :) I haven't figured out the "running" part yet. Ironically I think that happens the older and longer ya stay with it.
God is my everything now. It has been a long journey getting here, and I still have pains (its true that the mistakes you make in your past haunt you). But now, instead of trying to deal with those painful memories or haunting thoughts, I give them to God. I owe all I am or ever will be to Him
Friday, January 30, 2009
Today's Knight
Today, er, last night I sat on my couch/bed and considered today's knight. Here is what came up with :)
Today’s strong knight in armor bright
Sits high and proud ready to fight
His eyes are trained to see the danger
And still risks his life for lowly stranger
In the distance and struggle is seen
Between a damsel and a fiend
Spurring black steed into the battle
His whole will bent on killing this rabble
His sword is drawn his shield raised high
He let out valiant battle cry
This devil no match for valiant hero
Its chance of success was turned to zero
The lady, instead of thanking this knight
Was not all impressed with this valiant’s might.
She screamed a halt to stop his steed
Like a knight of honor, he did heed.
“My Lady, this beast wishes to kill you,”
“please, let my blade run him through!”
“No!” she shouted with hoarse voice
“I wish you leave, I’ve made my choice”
“But lady, please, this beast is large”
“Allow me now to finish my charge.”
“Young knight,” she said without a thought
“Tis not the first fight that I’ve fought”
The knight in shinning armor turned
For this a lessons hard to learn
The damsels today don’t want a knight
Instead they’re heart’s hard, ready to fight
Is that lady there in some distress?
Knights wish to do what they do best
Some men don’t fight, and it’s a shame
For its not them, but the women to blame
Let them fight and do their deed
Let them charge on valiant steed
For knights are rare, but rarer still
Is a lady who lets his charge be filled
Today’s strong knight in armor bright
Sits high and proud ready to fight
His eyes are trained to see the danger
And still risks his life for lowly stranger
In the distance and struggle is seen
Between a damsel and a fiend
Spurring black steed into the battle
His whole will bent on killing this rabble
His sword is drawn his shield raised high
He let out valiant battle cry
This devil no match for valiant hero
Its chance of success was turned to zero
The lady, instead of thanking this knight
Was not all impressed with this valiant’s might.
She screamed a halt to stop his steed
Like a knight of honor, he did heed.
“My Lady, this beast wishes to kill you,”
“please, let my blade run him through!”
“No!” she shouted with hoarse voice
“I wish you leave, I’ve made my choice”
“But lady, please, this beast is large”
“Allow me now to finish my charge.”
“Young knight,” she said without a thought
“Tis not the first fight that I’ve fought”
The knight in shinning armor turned
For this a lessons hard to learn
The damsels today don’t want a knight
Instead they’re heart’s hard, ready to fight
Is that lady there in some distress?
Knights wish to do what they do best
Some men don’t fight, and it’s a shame
For its not them, but the women to blame
Let them fight and do their deed
Let them charge on valiant steed
For knights are rare, but rarer still
Is a lady who lets his charge be filled
good days still out-doing the bad ones...
Last night I did two things that were amazing and spectacular.
1) I saved a lady from distress on Wonderwall (or was that my distress?)
2) I trained the dog to walk right beside me without a leash on, using only verbal signals and being more stubborn than it would be.
Moving on. God's been with me today. He knew I needed a good day. Lifted my spirits right off the ground. I don't know why He does things like that...but I'm so blessed that He does
Today, was definitely a good day. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what it was that made it a good day. Maybe it was the encouraging words that some ppl think I have a bod (please note that I'm taking some personal stabs at a dear friend...and lady). Or perhaps it was the fact that, after staying up till 1 a.m. and received 2 picture messages, I felt as though I just had an amazing day/night. NO, my day was NOT that pathetic.
I woke up to the sound of my room mate spraying no-stick onto the pan...or was it his realization we had no eggs? At some point in between there I fell asleep and woke up to the resumption of cooking upon his return from Winndixi. He made me breakfast. This was odd and strange to me, for it was the first meal I didn't play a hand in (a.k.a. doing all the work) making.
after breakfast I drank some energy SUPPLEMENTS (not drugs mind you) and headed to the gym to work out. I can honestly say that I've never had a better work out. I felt better after than I have in awhile :) After the work out I came home and helped my Asian friend with math. I know, I know. Your all thinking I'm a genius (way to stereotype Asians right?), but in fact, I'm not. He just doesn't like math (I feel like I let everybody down).
Anyway, then (a highlight of my day) I took Noah for a walk. We have the best of times together. I tell him all I can think to tell him. He knows all my secrets, but promised to never tell any of you (so don't even try).
I then proceeded to head over to a friends house where I laughed and carried on far to much, Went for a walk all over campus (3x) then, road my motorcycles on some sidewalks, and topped off the whole evening with some guitar hero (sorry Michael, I'm not a very accomplished bass player).
Yup, God is amazing :)
1) I saved a lady from distress on Wonderwall (or was that my distress?)
2) I trained the dog to walk right beside me without a leash on, using only verbal signals and being more stubborn than it would be.
Moving on. God's been with me today. He knew I needed a good day. Lifted my spirits right off the ground. I don't know why He does things like that...but I'm so blessed that He does
Today, was definitely a good day. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what it was that made it a good day. Maybe it was the encouraging words that some ppl think I have a bod (please note that I'm taking some personal stabs at a dear friend...and lady). Or perhaps it was the fact that, after staying up till 1 a.m. and received 2 picture messages, I felt as though I just had an amazing day/night. NO, my day was NOT that pathetic.
I woke up to the sound of my room mate spraying no-stick onto the pan...or was it his realization we had no eggs? At some point in between there I fell asleep and woke up to the resumption of cooking upon his return from Winndixi. He made me breakfast. This was odd and strange to me, for it was the first meal I didn't play a hand in (a.k.a. doing all the work) making.
after breakfast I drank some energy SUPPLEMENTS (not drugs mind you) and headed to the gym to work out. I can honestly say that I've never had a better work out. I felt better after than I have in awhile :) After the work out I came home and helped my Asian friend with math. I know, I know. Your all thinking I'm a genius (way to stereotype Asians right?), but in fact, I'm not. He just doesn't like math (I feel like I let everybody down).
Anyway, then (a highlight of my day) I took Noah for a walk. We have the best of times together. I tell him all I can think to tell him. He knows all my secrets, but promised to never tell any of you (so don't even try).
I then proceeded to head over to a friends house where I laughed and carried on far to much, Went for a walk all over campus (3x) then, road my motorcycles on some sidewalks, and topped off the whole evening with some guitar hero (sorry Michael, I'm not a very accomplished bass player).
Yup, God is amazing :)
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Pearl
My lover was found
Like a pearl from the sea
A speck of sand bound
In this world, just for me.
My words spoken that day
Like the hard grain of sand
Placed in my lovers sweet bay
In their heart like a brand.
My words sat in torment
Till love was brought forth
Could they know my words meant
Our lives would have worth?
Now where love was placed
A pearl once had lain
A timely reminder of all I did face
But left me something, forever, pain
For a time I stop fighting
And my pearls pulled from me
Gone, quick as lightening
Its lost now at sea
I'm not cynical always, but today was an exception. Just a random poem from my thoughts
Like a pearl from the sea
A speck of sand bound
In this world, just for me.
My words spoken that day
Like the hard grain of sand
Placed in my lovers sweet bay
In their heart like a brand.
My words sat in torment
Till love was brought forth
Could they know my words meant
Our lives would have worth?
Now where love was placed
A pearl once had lain
A timely reminder of all I did face
But left me something, forever, pain
For a time I stop fighting
And my pearls pulled from me
Gone, quick as lightening
Its lost now at sea
I'm not cynical always, but today was an exception. Just a random poem from my thoughts
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
A creative way to say you are a lousy bum without a job: I'm currently in the search for an appropriate means of which to gather income and thus meet my needs.
yes, currently i've had two job interviews, and am in the process of sending a resume` for the third. I've approached four business managers/owners with my best smile and neatest attire, and gotten the "we aren't hiring" mumbo-jumbo. Ah, life is sweet. Sarcasm? Well, to my room mate maybe, but who wouldn't kill to live on the East coast of Florida, own a surfboard and motorcycle, and be able to do whatever they wanted all day? Yeah, its not as great as it sounds when your inbetween college and are supposed to be working to pay off debts its not that grand.
Today was good, however. Woke up at 9 a.m. and started my day off in the right direction with a yogurt (strawberry, delicious). I chose to sleep on the couch vs. my pathetic excuse for a bed (its hideaway in the couch in my tiny, tiny room. I did the dishes, some laundry, jumped in the shower, and then headed off on my bike to the job interview. No, I will not tell you where (I'm rather ashamed of it actually). Now, normally I'm confident of job interviews, but my room mate has shaken that confidence with pessamism and, thus, effectivly destroyed all hope I had in getting the job (he wants me to wash airplanes, I just want a job).
I got home and decided that the dog was in need if a walk desperately (the leaping and yanking on the chain gave it away). That was a mistake. Anyone that lives in Florida has heard of a lovely lil creature I'm quite sure God didn't create and is a spawn of Satan himself: the No-See-Em. yeah, you can't see 'em, and they bite the HECK out of you.
I returned home, with pieces of me missing and cooked supper (why did I show off that I knew how to cook?). It was delicious (naturally). Now, I'm pulling a blank on what else to write. And since I know that I have at least one loyal fan waiting up till the wee hours of the night just to read this, I shall bid thee all a good evening.
yes, currently i've had two job interviews, and am in the process of sending a resume` for the third. I've approached four business managers/owners with my best smile and neatest attire, and gotten the "we aren't hiring" mumbo-jumbo. Ah, life is sweet. Sarcasm? Well, to my room mate maybe, but who wouldn't kill to live on the East coast of Florida, own a surfboard and motorcycle, and be able to do whatever they wanted all day? Yeah, its not as great as it sounds when your inbetween college and are supposed to be working to pay off debts its not that grand.
Today was good, however. Woke up at 9 a.m. and started my day off in the right direction with a yogurt (strawberry, delicious). I chose to sleep on the couch vs. my pathetic excuse for a bed (its hideaway in the couch in my tiny, tiny room. I did the dishes, some laundry, jumped in the shower, and then headed off on my bike to the job interview. No, I will not tell you where (I'm rather ashamed of it actually). Now, normally I'm confident of job interviews, but my room mate has shaken that confidence with pessamism and, thus, effectivly destroyed all hope I had in getting the job (he wants me to wash airplanes, I just want a job).
I got home and decided that the dog was in need if a walk desperately (the leaping and yanking on the chain gave it away). That was a mistake. Anyone that lives in Florida has heard of a lovely lil creature I'm quite sure God didn't create and is a spawn of Satan himself: the No-See-Em. yeah, you can't see 'em, and they bite the HECK out of you.
I returned home, with pieces of me missing and cooked supper (why did I show off that I knew how to cook?). It was delicious (naturally). Now, I'm pulling a blank on what else to write. And since I know that I have at least one loyal fan waiting up till the wee hours of the night just to read this, I shall bid thee all a good evening.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
