A Cross to Bear

Today has been a good day, yet a trial. I often find that my day is most defined by the few hours at the end, and rarely ends the same way it starts. Today started off as a good day, don't you love those? But by 1 or 2 I could tell things were going to just start slipping.

Sad as it is, text messaging and winning Guitar Hero III were the perks/highlights of my day....or was it lunch? Anyway, I did have a good time with friends this evening, but it was the burden for a certain one friend, whom God put on my shoulders to bear, which mellowed my fantastic day down to a struggle just to make it through. I felt a burden so strong for this friend as he told me what was going on in his life, and why he had given up on God. I too had been there, given up on religion, seen the corruption and evil taking place in the holy circles. I wanted nothing to do with it, and separated myself to a place far from God, and I was there to stay...I thought.

Everything in my screamed at my friend to see the amazing love of God. I tried, in vain it seemed, to tell him that God has a love for us we don't deserve, a want for us we can't comprehend, a desire for a relationship for the undesirable. I do not know if I did anything or not, but I do know that God is going to help my friend.

I remember being at that low point thinking that nothing could help, because I had no desire to pick myself up. I'd already lost everything I had, my life was in shambles, and God seemed to be no where. I didn't think I was worth it, honestly. It was at that low point when God found me.

I pray He finds my friend soon. I pray, when He finds that lost soul, that my friend will willingly give himself over, and see that there is no better way. I pray for my friend to desire to be forgiven. I see why on some mission fields people are flocking to be saved now. They have seen all their lives what "nothing" is like...what a life without God is like, and a man comes from across the world and shows them a life of purpose. Here we have so many distractions. Things that deaden our minds to our spiritual state. Its happened to me far to often. I see now though... without God I think I would just want to die, because without Him, my life is pointless...